Monday, May 9, 2005

Happy Belated Mother's Day and update

Well, it seems as though the illness bugs aren't done at our house.

Kayla has been sick with Gastroenteritis since Friday. I'm on the edge waiting to see who it strikes next, although praying it won't.

On a good note, all of her tests came back excellent!! There are no signs of reflux or anything physical causing her UTI's. Praise the Lord. Why she keeps getting them, we don't know. What I do know is that I am very susceptible to them myself, perhaps it's just something hereditary.

Went for my test results and I'm no further ahead. They don't know what's wrong with me. I do have to go and have some more blood work done, because the big tests (for RA, lupus and such) came back inconclusive. She is also sending me to see a Rheumatologist, so maybe he/she will have an answer. I should find out when that appointment is, tomorrow. I feel in my heart it's Fibromyalgia. Every single symptom I have read that is associated with it, I have. The only thing I'm unsure of is the 'trigger points' on my body, because no one has tested that.

She also told me no more of the pain medication...yes, the pain medication that works, the pain medication that allows me to function somewhat normally, is not going to be prescribed to me by her anymore. Although she did prescribe medication that does nothing for me, the one that I specifically told her does not work alone, she gave me. *big sigh* So I have rationed out the last bit that I have, so I can at least have some part of the day to get things done.
I'm praying for the Lord to let this Reumatologist either have a diagnosis and a plan or at least give me the meds that work.
This is truly draining every ounce of 'me' out of me. I hate whatever is going on, and I'm trying desperately not to let my family suffer for it. Bill has been so patient, but let's face it, it get's tiresome hearing your wife complain about being in pain all the time. I'm just trying to suffer through it now, silently. I feel lost and sad, because how do you explain un-explainable pain? At least if you bash your arm and have a bruise, there is something somebody can visually see. With this, you can't see anything. I don't want to go anywhere, because sometimes I have to start limping because the muscles are so tight and sore in my legs, or my knees are so swollen I can't bend them properly to walk. My wrists are swollen and can't bend in certain directions without horrible pain. I have spasms in my hands, jaw and legs. Not to mention the jerks and jumps my legs do when I'm at rest (this is from the restless legs syndrome) and then when I try to sleep the ache and want to stretch and move. The drugs she put me on for that, I can't take for more than 5 days in a row because anymore than that my body becomes addicted to them and I could start seizuring if I stop...but that's alright because they don't do anything anyways. I'm just lost, thank goodness I have the Lord to pray to, sometimes that is the only way I can finally fall asleep, is saying the same prayer over and over again.
The one good thing that the other drugs she prescribed (the 'new' pain medication) seems to have brought down some of the inflammation, so this has made movement a bit easier, but I'm still taking the pain medication from before, so I'm afraid for when I have none left.

Oh well, let us pray that the Rheumatologist can help, if not, I honestly do not know what I will do. I know I cannot go on living life like this.

Sorry for the downer post, I really needed to vent, and I don't want to vent to my family or Bill anymore.

Well, Kayla is on the toilet again and it 'sounds' like I should go and help.
God Bless.


Sylvia said...

Hello Penny, I am thinking and praying for you. Please take care of yourself. I am glad though that you updated, I was worried. Have a good day!!!

Veronica said...

My mother in law has Fibromyalgia, I know how much pain she stays in and I feel for you. Your post wasn't a downer post, we all need to vent sometimes.
Happy Belated Mother's Day to you 2! I'm glad everything turned out okay for Kayla, God is good!!!! Take care!